To fireproof your relationships you must do the following:
I. Pursue Similar Interests (v.8-9)
A. Both have a desire to be together (v.8)
B. Both have a desire to interact with each other (v.9)
a. Solomon wasted no time in getting to Shulamite’s home.
b. Solomon was stricken with Shulamite’s beauty, all he could do was stare.
– “As Solomon arrives at her house, he stops to stand behind the wall. He does not barge in uninvited, as though she were his by right, but waits for her.… [T]he focus of this verse on Solomon’s looking in through the window from the outside is an inversion of a familiar O.T. motif of a woman looking out the window for the return of a warrior.”
II. Practice Shared Interactions (v.10-14)
A. Solomon invites Shulamite on a Spring time date.
- Solomon wanted this woman. He wanted to be alone with her in the “secret places” finding out everything he could about her. Their courtship brought them to the point of knowing that they were fully meant for each other and their mutual desire was to be husband and wife.
- “All too often we take for granted the ones we love. Perhaps we get caught up in the day-to-day process of living and working, and we neglect to share our true inner feelings. “She knows I love her,” we tell ourselves. But we never tell our spouse.”
III. Purge Separating Intrusions (v.15-17)
A. Learn to identify and remove intrusions that separate intimacy.
a. The foxes in the vineyard are reflective of obstacles that can separate marital objectives.
b. Solomon’s shepherding duty was the obstacle that separated him from Shulamite. Other “little foxes” could include:
- Conflict- Having selfish opinions and desires. [James 4:1-3]
- Conversation- How we talk to each other or communicate. [Js 3:5-10; Eph. 4:29; Matt. 12:36-37]
- Callous- an attitude of indifference about a situation or person. [Matt. 13:15; Prov. 24: 30-34]
Points to Ponder:
- Intimacy thrives while engaging in mutual activities. Plan to do something with your spouse this week. (Drive, Workout, Movie, Dinner)
- Keep a pulse on your relationship by discussing it with your spouse. Determine the weak areas and make them stronger.
- Remove obstacles “little foxes” together. You build relationships together, you must maintain them together.